Blogging can be scary sometimes, especially when you’re a new blogger.
I don’t know what it is, but I’m really in the mood to give some advice.
If you’ve ever been scared to post something on your blog, don’t worry! You’re not alone! Here is a list of 4 things I used to be afraid to do on my blog, but now I’ve learned to think otherwise.
Talking to big bloggers.
dramatic backstory
When I first started blogging, there was nothing scarier than *fake gasp* reaching out and commenting on other people’s posts. Did I really need to do this? No thank you.
But whenever I do something, I have to do it big. The first comments I ever made were on “big blogs”. I was so excited to see what my favorite bloggers would reply with! It was like I was talking to a celebrity, or something! I put my heart and soul into those comments. I spell-checked them, and I made sure that they were all interesting and made it clear that I had read and appreciated the post.
And you know what happened? No one ever replied.
In fact, most of those bloggers only chose to reply to their select few blogging friends in those posts.
Because this was very early in my blogging journey, I slowly began to grow sad about the book blogging community. If this was how the “big bloggers” treated their commenters, then I just… wouldn’t comment! That was the only apparent solution!
I mean, right?
why this shouldn’t be scary to you
Eventually, months and months passed, and I realized that most of those “big bloggers” who had never replied to me had been through some tough times when I made the comments. Some of them were on hiatuses and eventually did reply very late, and some of them were struggling with their mental health. And still, some of them never replied, but I now believe this was due to the overwhelming amount of comments on their blogs.
It wasn’t until I started getting 20+ comments on my posts that I realized how exhausting it can be to reply, and how easy it can be to accidentally never approve a comment. I love reading all of your comments, and I love replying to the best of my ability, but sometimes it just takes forever!
Just the other day, I was one month (one whole month!) behind on replying to comments, and it took me nearly 3 hours to reply to half of them. *wipes brow just thinking about it*
That’s another lesson for you: don’t let your comments pile up like that! Just don’t do it. Eventually it’ll grow into a habit you can’t shake, and then one day you’ll look into the mirror and see me, a small, vicious, latina girl who hoards comments and pingbacks until they literally have nowhere else to go and they’re all moved to my storage cave for my audition on that strange hoarding show.
A few months ago, I reached out to one of the “big bloggers” who had never replied, and I realized that she probably missed my first comment because it went to spam or something like that. She replied quickly to my second comment on her blog, and now we’re becoming friends!
the moral of the story
If you get anything out of this, I would like for you to never be afraid to comment! If you read a post, from any kind of blogger, just know that their eyes will probably light up with joy for every comment they get. Every blogger I know appreciates every single one of the comments they receive, and they will happily reply to as many as they can!
Big bloggers are not scary – they are people like you and me, and they probably blog for fun and their love of books! Before big bloggers got to where they are now, they were small bloggers, too. And they were probably scared of commenting, as well, but eventually they didn’t let that stop them from growing their blog experience.
Don’t be afraid to reach out to bloggers with more of a following than you! When I first started my blog, I was embarrassed about approaching just about anyone while I only had 5 followers. But now, I wish I had started talking to other bloggers sooner! It really helped me to engage with the community and meet all kinds of awesome bloggers.
Of course, this is not something you should feel required to do. If you would rather talk to bloggers who have the same amount of experience as you, then that’s great as well!
But just don’t be like me, who only kept to myself and simultaneously thought the entire world would love me just because I posted WWW Wednesdays and Monthly Wrap-Ups 🙂
Writing posts out of your comfort zone.
I used to be scared of this all the time, but now I ask myself… “What else can I post that no one else has done recently and makes me anxious to post but I’ll do it anyway?” Like this post, right here! Wow, this is scary.
It can be hard to write a type of post you’ve never done before, but it can also be good for your blog. Writing posts out of your comfort zone can help you gain experience in the types of posts you want to write, and even if it’s not perfect the first time you write it, you still have many opportunities to try again!
For example, I once viewed discussion posts with great fear. What could I possibly discuss with others? What could others possibly say in response? Could other people even relate to my experiences?
Sometimes people will relate to your posts, but it’s okay if they don’t. Not everyone can relate to your posts, but they can always find it interesting and appreciate your effort!
Even when a post is not relatable to everyone, the post can still be interesting because it represents your opinions and experience. Allow for your posts to be about you, and to be as personal as you want them to be, because then, it doesn’t matter if it’s highly relatable or not. If your viewers like your blog, they’ll like hearing about your perspective in a unique post. It doesn’t even have to be fancy or professional! It just has to be you.
And, when you write posts you’ve never done before, you’ll be trying new things and learning about your blogging style. If you write a discussion post and decide it’s not your thing – that’s totally fine! Do whatever makes you most comfortable, but also don’t be afraid to test your comfort zone every once in a while. 🙂
Tagging other people’s posts.
For some reason, this concept really scared me because I can never really, truly know how a blogger is going to respond. Before I tagged anyone, I would ask myself, Will they like that I gave them a shout out? Will they be embarrassed because it’s not even their best post? Will they ever see the pingback? Wait, what if they’re something wrong with my pingbacks? Um, what if –
Most likely, they will highly appreciate the shout out! Don’t worry about this too much, because if it really worries you, then just know that there is no handbook to book blogging that requires you to shout out or tag anyone. You don’t have to worry at all, or mention the post. If you want to tag them, then go ahead – give it a try, and see what happens. There’s no harm in trying.
When I first tagged others on my blog, I think it was tagging them in a Book Tag. Some people responded, and some people didn’t. I was grateful that some responded to my tag, but for the ones who didn’t… I constantly wondered if I had offended them or something. Did they not like tags? Was there actually something wrong with my pingbacks, or was I just being paranoid?
If you’re having trouble with pingbacks… 😉
📚 related: 8 Things I Should Have Known When I Started Blogging
Now that I am slightly more experienced, I realize that those bloggers who never responded most likely a) just forgot to respond, or b) the pingback got lost in a plethora of other pingbacks that they never saw because sometimes the pingbacks just pile up, y’know?
As someone who hoards pingbacks like a tiny dragon who hoards her gold coins, I value every shout-out and tag, but… sometimes I just forget to approve them! Or sometimes they go to spam! Or, sometimes I’ll open an internet tab and read the tag but then I’ll have to make a sandwich or something, and the tab gets forgotten in a sea of other open tabs until I just delete them all at once.
But either way…
✨ ✨ ✨
this tiny book dragon (i.e. me) would like to issue an apology for never responding to some of your tags!
the tags are greatly appreciated, and I promise I saw it! 😌 if I never responded to it, it’s either lost or just sitting somewhere in the pile of other pingbacks I should have responded to a long time ago.
✨ ✨ ✨
the moral of the story
Please don’t be afraid to mention other people in your posts! It’s a great way to show others that you read and appreciate their blogs.
Blog hopping on a blog for the first time.
Sometimes I’m just scared of commenting on someone’s blog for the first time, but I have do idea why.
Blog hopping can take a lot of effort, if you do it right. A good blog-hopper will 1) be kind in the comment 2) respond using points from the post to show that they read it 3) comment in 2 or more sentences.
But all of this can also take so much time, and if the original blogger never responds, or just says “thank you!!”… then what? Did you just waste your time on a long and thoughtful comment for nothing?
Well, no, no you didn’t. And you know why? Because at least you tried! 💫 You tried to leave a thoughtful comment, and you can do it again on someone else’s blog, and maybe that someone else will be more responsive and thankful. It’s also possible that the original blogger we’re talking about here just didn’t have time to comment a lot, and maybe they’ll be more responsive next time you visit!
the moral of the story
Blog hopping can be scary sometimes, but what’s the worst that could happen?
I find blog hopping to be extremely helpful. When I first started blogging, I read the comments on my favorite blogs and found other blogs by clicking on their profiles! Eventually, I tried to comment on as many blogs as possible, to figure out what kinds of comments were acceptable for individual bloggers and which bloggers were more friendly than others.
Commenting on several blogs per day (aka blog hopping) is a good idea, because more people will see your comments and possibly gravitate towards your blog to check it out. Even if you’re not trying to build a massive following, this still increases your chances of finding blogging friends and improving your blogger voice!
I don’t know, this post kind of turned into me sharing some weird inner thoughts about blogging… 🙈 I kind of don’t want to post this anymore, but oh well, it’s here already.
Were you ever scared of any of these things? Have you overcome any other scary blogger milestones? Was this post even helpful?
Let me know, and chat with me about it!
You can also be my friend on Goodreads!
Happy reading, everyone! 😊
I’m so glad I stumbled upon your blog. I honestly felt all of these fears deep in my soul as I was reading this post. Blogging on tough topics and especially leaving comments on other people’s post is something I still struggle with to this day! You’ve inspired me to get out of my comfort zone! Thanks for the great read!
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Aw, thank you so much! I’m glad this post was helpful to you. 🙂 I hope that leaving comments becomes easier for you soon – it’s one of the best ways to grow your blog, but remember that your unique content is also important as well! Good luck with everything!
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this is the most relatable post! I used to be terrified of commenting on other people’s blogs and when I first started blogging when I was a teenager, I hardly ever did it because once when I commented on a big blogger’s blog I got a very negative response and that made me too anxious to try again for a while. But when I started blogging again last year, I really made an effort to reach out to people and have found that even bigger bloggers are actually really friendly! I feel like blogging is also a lot less cliquey than it used to be, which has helped with my commenting anxiety a lot.
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Thanks so much, Mel! I remember being afraid of commenting on other blogs because I never knew what would be a good coment. I’m sorry you got a negative response from a blogger, that’s terrible! 😦 But I’m glad everything is better for you now! I remember hearing that blogging can be cliquey sometimes, but since I started, it hasn’t really been a problem for me.
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this post is SO GREAT!!! there were so many of these things i felt when i first started blogging and seeing you mention and debunk them is so validating.
talking to big bloggers!!! definitely a thing i had to overcome but i was quickly surprised to see how friendly and kind and lovely everyone is 🤧 the blogging community is so sweet
i LOVE reading discussion posts and new ideas i just love seeing how genius and creative some bloggers can get, its truly beautiful
i seriously enjoyed reading this post, fantastic work 💖
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Thank you, May!! I’m glad you agree with some of these points – when I wrote this post, I was a bit worried that not many others experienced these things too, haha.
Big bloggers are some of the most kind and helpful people! And I especially love to learn from big bloggers, and read what they say about blog growth and blogging voices.
Thank you so much for enjoying the post! 😊
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Wow, this post is just what I needed!
I am a brand spankin’ newbie to this community because for years I just watched booktube videos, but starting a blog is something I always kind of dreamed about. I’m so glad I finally started!
I find myself getting intimidated a lot, so this really helps me push through and realize that the majority of people on here are kind and warm and won’t judge me for being me.
Also, I didn’t even know what blog hopping meant until I read this post! I was doing it anyway though because I’ve been having a lot of fun exploring other people’s blogs and commenting on them, and honestly I never really expect replies but it’s been great that I’ve gotten a couple!
I’m so glad I found your blog, I love your blog’s design and based on this post you seem really nice, so I’m excited to read more from you!
Take care,
Zoe
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I’m glad you found this helpful, Zoe! I’m so happy you decided to start a blog – I too started because of the booktubers I watched! 💕 It can be a little awkward at times, but it’s all about practice and seeing what works best for you!
I hope to see you around more, and to see your blog grow! Good luck with everything, and I hope you enjoy your time in the Book Community! (And thank you! You’re so sweet!)
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Thank you so much Xandra! You’re so sweet, too. Your advice is really helpful and your encouragement means a lot. ❤ Keep being amazing.
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Xandra this post was so amazing and what you said about big book bloggers is so true! they are all so NOT scary, and i love that they still take the time to interact with their audience even though it’s large. as someone who gets a few comments a post and has a bad habit of letting them pile up, I can appreciate just how much time and energy replying to comments takes! sometimes I really wanna just say “thank you” or just like the comment, but then I remember how much work the commenter must have put into their comment and I try my best to reply! Amazing post, Xandra 😍
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Ahh thank you, Caitlin! Big bloggers are not as scary as they sound, and they’re only “big” because their audience cares about them, and they care about their readers! Some big bloggers are extremely friendly and helpful!
I remember the first time I let my comments pile up, and that was… I think it was in April? And I’ve been behind ever since 😅 Learn from my mistakes, haha! If the comment is just “I loved this post! 🙂 ” I’ll usually just say “Thank you!” But most of my comments are thoughtful, which means that I put more love into my comments… but that’s totally okay, too!
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“don’t let your comments pile up like that!”
I don’t get /that/ many comments, but I do tend to let them build up on multiple posts, so I needed to hear this.
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I hope you can take this advice, haha! I’m still trying to catch up on my comments right now 😅
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Wow, this post is so relatable!! I completely agree with these points, especially the blog hopping part. I try my best to leave thoughtful comments on other people’s posts on a (semi) regular basis (it does take a long time!) but often there’s that little nagging voice in the back of my head wondering if I would be better off spending that time making posts… but that’s what being active and part of the blogging community is all about: spreading the love! ❤
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Thank you, Holly! 😊 I try to leave comments on blogs as much as possible, but it sometimes feels like it’s still not enough!
There are a lot of different parts of being a blogger, and it all takes a lot of time, but it’s worth it because the community is amazing! 💕
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Great list ^^ I can definitely still relate to this, as silly as it might seem xd I’m just always so scared people might not reply or simply ignore when it’s taken me so much to comment, and I’m afraid people might find me weird or awkward. It truly is a *struggle*. I’m glad I’ve found the book community is really nice and everyone is just as scared as I am haha And yes, it can definitely get overwhelming to keep up with everything!
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I agree! Sometimes I think my comments are too personal or awkward, but comments are comments, and they’re usually very appreciated! Everyone in the book community has been very kind to me, and I’m glad I’ve found this community! It’s a bit overwhelming sometimes, but it’s worth it 🙂
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SUCH A GOOD POST. Sorry for shouting at you but for real, I wish this had been around when I started blogging? (Although, my blogging origins were on Myspace 12 years ago so it was a bit different.) Because there are so many scary things about blogging and reaching out to fellow bloggers or publishers or authors, you know? And it’s so good to see things like this to say, hey, it’s okay, we’ve all been there.
But, honestly, I always feel so overwhelmed by comments and it makes me sad to think that newer bloggers might see delayed responses as discouraging or something of that variety, so it’s always good to see fellow bloggers making posts like this to help ease any concerns. It’s so kind and necessary and I love it. I feel you on being a month late. Sometimes I do that as well (and then I want to kick my own butt because procrastination is always 10x more overwhelming for me in the long run) and yeah!
In short, this comment is turning into a novel so I’ll wrap it up in a nice little bow and all that jazz: these are all very helpful statements. I always love encouragement to write out of our comfort zones because that’s where some truly worthwhile things happen. Blog hopping was SO scary the first time I did it. It’s true that commenting someone for the first time can be a bit daunting and WEIRDLY I think I’m shyer online, and in these circumstances, than offline? IT’S SO WEIRD.
Thanks for sharing!
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Ahh thank you, Jessica! I agree, I wish I had been told things like this when I started, and it’s always nice to see that other people also were worried about these kinds of things!
Sometimes (like right now!) I get overwhelmed by comments, but a lot of it has to do with putting off the replying for a very long time. I’m wondering if people don’t like that it takes me forever to reply, and I wish I hadn’t let them pile up so much
Thanks for sharing your experience with this, too!
I often leave very long comments on some of my favorite blogs, and I always wonder if they hate such long comments, but I personally love reading long comments! 😊 Don’t worry about it! Thank you so much!
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I remember when I first started, commenting was super scary on blogs particularly when I’d only managed to find two. I did quickly find more though as I joined the New Bloggers Discord group from the first day so that was literally my saving grace. I think the heartbreaking thing is if I want to support a blogger who I’ve noticed has left a string of likes on my posts, but I can’t find anything on their blog I feel I could read and give them a comment on. Breaks my heart but I rarely do that since I’m still behind on my blog hopping these days.
Discussion posts are my love Xandra, I started out with writing them what scared me was writing book reviews. It still scares me to this day and they’re the source of so much of my stress and worry haha.
Loved this post, all these things can seem scary and for some of us we still find them scary haha
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I relate to that so much! I sometimes want to comment on someone’s blog, but I often have trouble connecting with their content. It happens, sometimes, and I would rather leave a meaningful comment on a post I truly enjoy. I always feel like I’m behind on everything, but I’m trying to be better about it!
Discussion posts used to scare me a lot, but recently I’ve been so excited to talk about certain things that I end up writing 2,000+ words, haha!
Thank you so much, Clo! 😊💕
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Wow, that was wonderful post and I agree with your points.
Commenting and writing post out of my comfort zone still scares me.
Comments are usually very general from me because half of the time I don’t know what to say, specially about the books I haven’t read.
I have never written a discussion post. I don’t know what to and how to. I only post reviews, tags (a year ago, not anymore) and promotional posts.
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Thank you so much, Yesha! 🙂 I’m glad you agree with my post! Writing out of my own comfort zone still scares me a bit, but I know I will get used to it, and my posts will get better by doing so!
I hope you will find the courage to write a discussion post soon, if you wish! My best advice for that is to ask a question to your viewers (such as “What do you think about audiobooks?”) and then share your thoughts and experiences in the post, in order to make a point.
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That’s good idea. I already have one or two in mind. I will try to write post on it soon.
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Great post! Very informative. I, too, was also very afraid to speak to others on their blogs at first. I guess I was still kind of shy. It’s natural and normal now, and it feels sweet that there are new bloggers looking up to me now the way that I used to look up to others! Congratulations on all of your success 😀
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Thank you so much! Yes, it can be a bit scary to reach out to other bloggers, but it just takes a little courage and practice. 🙂 And thank you!
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Another fantastic post, Xandra! I used to be so scared to post outside my comfort zone and to blog hop a lot too! In the former’s case, I was concerned that I would receive a bunch of negative feedback for some topics. But, thankfully, this hardly ever was the case, and I received so many amazing opinions on certain topics! As for blog hopping, I was scared that I would come off as annoying, if I was constantly commenting on blogs! Hahaha!
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Thank you so much! When I started blogging, I never knew what to post! I was always afraid to try new things, because what if no one liked what I had to say? But I’ve never had any negative feedback, thankfully, and now I’m not scared to post out of my comfort zone every now and then! And I felt that too – I’m still a bit embarrassed when I comment on several posts on someone’s blog at a time!
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Wow this really helps
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I feel like you just perfectly described all of my fears from when I first started book blogging! I remember the first time that I commented on my absolute favorite book blogger/reviewers post… I was SO scared. But they commented back the same day and were super sweet! I’ve had tonsss of pingbacks go ignored, but I actually think it might be my fault because I didn’t learn until a few months ago that you have to ping to a specific post instead of their site, and I ALWAYS pinged to their site, lol. It definitely felt at first like they were just ignoring it, but I’ve realized that that’s definitely not it. I’ve also come across posts from other bloggers while blog hopping where I was mentioned and I never even got the ping! I always feel so bad knowing that they may think that I ignored the post.
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Exactly! Many of the biggest bloggers are so kind and sweet, and it makes me proud to be in this community! I’m so glad you related to some of these things. 🙂 I once to pinged to a blogger’s website and was very confused why they never responded to me, but I quickly realized that I was doing it wrong! A few months ago, I was getting tagged A LOT by some of my newer blogger friends, and I noticed that most of them tried to tag me but didn’t know how. I keep trying to tell my viewers how to do it properly, so that they don’t run into the same problem!
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I’m so glad you made this post though because now bloggers who are newer or unsure of how to do certain things can find this and get a little extra advice/help!!
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